Master feels stifled Chapter 4

A whole Chapter this time! Enjoy~

Chapter 4

I didn’t know how Yue Lao Hong managed to convert Qian Gu to Mo Dao.
But I could imagine. She must have told him that the sect was heartless, that his Master was unjust; making Qian Gu grow resentful, lose his way and walk down the wrong path.

Qian Gu had a lot of natural talent, from a young age he had already cultivated his immortal body. After falling into Mo Dao, his cultivation advanced even quicker.
Kong Ling sect’s disciples were afraid of Qian Gu taking revenge, of him building up his power using crooked ways and means to fight Kong Ling sect.
Qian Gu knew all of the sect’s secrets, was familiar with the sect’s methods. If he decided to us any dirty tricks to damage Kong Ling’s seal and let the source of evil energy leak out, then that would be a huge problem.

But compared to the worried juniors, I quite believed in Qian Gu’s character. Even though I knew that he had joined Mo Dao, I still believed him.
I waved my hand and said:

”In any case, nothing has happened yet. Making wild guesses is of no use. If one day he really dares to attack Kong Ling, I will slay him myself.”

After saying my part, I headed back to Kong Ling peak.
Even though I returned to the palace hall I had lived in for hundreds of years, I couldn’t get used to it. After being there for a few days; in the yard I could hear no sounds of Qian Zhi’s continuous chatter, I could see no shadow of Qian Gu occasionally passing by my door and pausing to look at me. This peak seemed deathly still.

I couldn’t stay here anymore and went to Ling Xu cave to ask Qian Zhi:

”Do you admit your wrongs? If you do, then I’ll let you out. If you don’t, then I’ll leave you locked up here and go to wander the world by myself.”
He was sulking like a child and didn’t even look at me.

So, I went to wander the world.

I roamed about for five or six years. Listening to Jiang Hu’s rumours, it seemed Qian Gu’s reputation in Mo Dao became more flourishing by the day. He even became the evil sect’s head. During this time, Yue Lao Hong provided him with quite a lot of help.

But these were all outside things. As long as they did not bother my Kong Ling sect, they were of no concern to me.
Roaming around by myself, after some time it also got boring.

I carefully pondered the matters of the last decades and felt like I had truly failed. One of my disciples liked me, but that liking was too excessive. Another one of my disciples was not excessive in that regard, but he harboured a lot of resentment.

In the end, there was still no one to inherit my legacy.

After considering, in the fields between the mountains, I accepted another disciple.

A girl with natural aptitude, with a lively, but honest and kind-hearted character.
I gave her the name of “Qian Ling”.
I was not hoping for her name to be remembered for all of eternity, also not hoping for her to know when to proceed and when to stop.

I only wanted her to live up to her natural talent, be a skilful and charming girl.

I brought her back to Kong Ling peak and told her that she had a former First Senior Brother, who had joined the Mo Dao. I then brought her to Ling Xu cave to see her Second Senior Brother, whose hair and beard had already grown very long.

I told Qian Ling:

”You are a girl, don’t turn out to be like them.”

Qian Ling, looking at her Second Senior Brother locked up inside jade and iron bars, nodded.

In a blink, ten years had passed. In these ten years, towards my own character, my eye for picking people and my education methods…….

I deeply called them in question.

Very deeply.

After the sect’s junior disciples came for the thousand time to tattle to me: Senior Grandaunt has started fighting with some Senior Uncle again; I only tiredly waved my hand:

” Let them fight. If she wins, I will sort her out. If she loses, you guys just watch her being sorted out.”

I added: ”Don’t let her die.”

This third disciple of mine, was vigorous……… too vigorous.

On every other day she would climb the house to tear off the roof tiles.

(meaning that she is too unruly)

Initially, I still softly reprimanded or strictly berated her.
The sentence:” If you continue to be like this, then I will drive you out of the sect”, had been said thousands of times, but on her, it had no effect.

Thinking back to that year when Qian Gu heard this sentence, his face immediately paled for what felt like three days.

Kids nowadays, how come they are harder and harder to raise.

In the end Qian Ling still won. Proudly, with one swollen eye, she told me:

”Master, those bastards down there bullied the kitchen helper again. I helped beat them up. Let’s see if they will still dare to bully the weak in the future. They think I, their grandaunt, am not able to beat them to death!”

I shot her a glance: “Can’t you use your head to solve problems?”

She rubbed her nose:” Using fists is more convenient.”

Are those words that a delicate girl should be uttering?!

I heaved a sigh and put down my book. I looked at her and remembered her appearance when she was young.

Ai……………. feel so stifled!

“Go clean up the library.” I punished her. “Sweep it very clean.”

“Ai, okay.”, she happily replied, not even realizing that I was punishing her.

I speechlessly looked up at the sky.

A female disciple with a heart careless to this point……
After all she had still grown in the opposite direction from what I had hoped when naming her.

That day, as Qian Ling swept the library, she dragged outside a big chest. It was my first time seeing that.

I asked her: “What is this?”

“I don’t know, I found it in the corner of the library’s attic. Looks like it hasn’t been touched for a long time. I was afraid that it would mould, so I pulled it out to dry in the sun.”

While speaking she opened the box. It was stacked to the brim with picture scrolls. Opening the scrolls, you could always see the face of the same woman, be it standing on a mountain or lying on a couch. Her appearance, whether happy or angry, was always quite distracted and preoccupied.

“Master, these are all you.”

Qian Ling opened one picture and suddenly began to laugh:

“Aiya, this picture is very lifelike. Master, look at you.”

I glimpsed at the scroll in her hands. It depicted a woman with rosy cheeks lying next to the alcohol pond, secretly being kissed by a man.
I nearly gasped heavily.

“Master, who is the man? This posture of you two…. “

Qian Ling brightly smiled: “Really beautiful!”

Listen, are those words that an unmarried girl should be saying?!

Inside, I was fuming. But obstructing my rage was a secret wound hidden in the bottom of my heart.

Without blinking my eyes, I lied to her:

”That is me in the picture, it is also me who drew this. This man was Master’s fantasy man when I was young and immature. It is unreal. There is no use for these anymore, go burn them.”

Startled, Qian Ling looked at me:

”But Master, just now you didn’t even know what was in the box.”

I went towards my room:

”Burn it, burn it.”

Closing my room’s door, my old face unrestrainedly began to heat up.
A scene that had for many years only been stored in my head, has suddenly been turned into a painting and entered my vision. Really makes one unable not to feel alarmed.

I leaned a while on the door. Suddenly, I smelled a whiff of smoke. I pulled open the door to look outside and saw Qian Ling completely burning the picture scrolls.
The corners of my mouth twitched, but I restrained my feelings and went back into my room to heavily sigh for the whole afternoon.

Qian Gu, he……… concealed quite a lot of things.

After this event passed, the days also passed like always. Only, the times that Qian Ling went down the mountain to get into trouble became fewer.
I thought that this lass had finally grown up. But one day, Qian Ling had suddenly learnt a new skill. After showing off to me she exclaimed:

”I practiced for three months to be able to do this, but I heard First Senior Brother didn’t even need two hours to master this skill. I’m really too far from that level.”

I was dumbfounded.” How did you know?”

Qian Ling covered her mouth. She hummed and hawed a long time before answering:

” I went to Ling Xu cave to look for Second Senior Brother to play.”

I hadn’t explicitly forbidden Qian Ling to look for Qian Zhi.

“Playing is fine, but remember the principles. Not allowed to let him out.”

“Why?”

“Your Second Senior Brother’s temperament is not steady. Locking him up is: one, to stabilize his mind; two…….. if you let him out, he will surely walk straight towards Mo Dao. He is not like your First Senior Brother.
Your First Senior Brother has a firm mind, he knows how to handle his matters. Things that would harm himself, harm Kong Ling or harm the world, he would not do.
Your Second Senior Brother ……. is too easily manipulated by other people.”

Qian Ling, after hearing me explain so seriously, blanked for quite a while:

” Actually Master, you………. have considered quite a lot of matters………….”

I rolled my eyes.

” You thought that Master has lived these hundred years in vain; would be like you, brainlessly doing things?”

Qian Ling shook her head and good-naturedly laughed.

” But come to speak of it, First Senior Brother has already left here for so many years. Master, when speaking of him, it seems like you still believe in him.”

I went silent.

I naturally believed in Qian Gu, he was my first disciple. One I brought up and taught wholeheartedly. He would have been my life’s biggest pride, one I’d have been able to show off to other people.
Even though he later went down the wrong path, but if you really considered it, Qian Gu hadn’t done anything wrong.

If there was fault, then it was completely mine.

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